Help! He Thinks Im Fat

At the time of her wedding she wore a size 2. Her pregnancy with her daughter caused her to balloon up to a size 14. A couple of years later she was a whopping size 18. Unfortunately, rather than joining a gym or getting rid of the baby pounds, she was plagued by post partum depression, which "broke the camel's back;" she demanded that her husband would just have to love her for who she was on the inside. And while he did fall in love with her as a person, she felt unattractive to herself and her voluptuous size 18 and enormous breasts did not help in her feeling the least bit attractive. By this time, however, she had stopped caring.

I'm sure you've heard similar stories.

So what are you to do when you feel stuck in a body you don't want to be in, fighting a depression that makes you feel guilty for having it in the first place since you just gave birth to another life and are "supposed to" float on cloud nine. You're so uncomfortable that by now you have resorted to slip-on shoes since you can barely bend over long enough to tie your shoes.

You've tried working out but the time constraint now with the new child keeps you busy. You've tried every diet there is, and the more they fail (and we know 95% of them fail) the more depressed you get. And the excuses for not getting back into shape are endless

So there is no time for the gym, diets don't work, perhaps you should leave the marriage? But what would happen if you did?

You realize that life goes on, whether you're thin or fat.

Here are 3 simply tips that can help us get motivated again to be our best and bring the flame back into our love life:

1. Stop all excuses. Instead of focusing on all the excuses that prevent you from losing weight, start focusing on all the good things that come to you from having a sexy figure. Trust that since you have had a slim figure in the past, you will get there again in the near future. No one is asking you to lose all the weight by next week, just get started and stay consistent.

2. Know that this is not about him, this is all about you. You are in this together, yes, but losing the weight for him is superficial and will only make your weight loss temporary. You must want to lose the weight for you and you only. You are the one feeling unhealthy or unattractive and you want to feel great about yourself. Having your partner be attracted to you once again is an added bonus and benefit and can serve as a motivator, but it should not be the main reason.

3. No reasons for pouting. There is no reason for you to put your hands on your hips and demanding from him to love you no matter your size. If he truly loves you I can assure you that he loves you no matter what, however, I can also assure you that men by nature are stimulated visually (and they are just as much turned off by visuals). No matter how much you try to bend Nature's rules, in the end you only hurt yourself by making unrealistic demands of your partner. Instead, learn to work with nature and ask Life to help you create a perfectly healthy and sexy body once again.

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