Here’s a note from my inbox:
Hi Carol,
Thank you so much for this week’s newsletter. I have often said that food (simple carbs and sugar) are as addictive as drugs and alcohol. Although, I try not to limit myself to a low-carb lifestyle (I now know that restricting any food only backfires), I do know that eating just one cookie is extremely difficult for me.
I know that eating a bagel, even a low-carb bagel, is going to leave me feeling like I want more to eat even though I may not be hungry. I often feel like the alcoholic who cannot have just one drink. I am still trying to balance not restricting any foods with the reality of the reaction that I know my body will have if I have simple carbs.
This emotional eating is truly a life long challenge for me and I am not sure that I will ever get to the point where I feel completely at ease about eating. I have gained weight over the summer. I feel like I won the battle but I have lost the war.
Luckily, there is always a new day and although today wasn’t perfect (I did manage to have just one cookie–although it was the size of my hand–it wasn’t the worst either.
Hopefully, tomorrow will be better.
Thank you for everything.
DR
Dear DR,
Thanks for your note. It can certainly feel like a war when you are trying to find peace with yourself and your urges. It is always harder to unlearn habits, especially when they result in temporary comfort.
I think the hardest part of this is giving yourself permission to eat, without feeling terrified of what will happen when you do. It takes time to develop trust in yourself. It also takes support over time.
IDEALLY, you will become able to give yourself permission to eat anything AND choose foods that feel good in your body. You have already developed an awareness of how different foods impact your body and your cravings.
So you are making progress.
Feeling like you have a CHOICE, and honoring what feels good in your body is empowering.
While I don’t know if you will ever feel completely at ease, you can get to the point where you are:
1. not beating yourself up
2. know that you can get back on track quickly, and . . .
3. not feeling so discouraged when you have a lapse
Here’s some tips to help you along the way:
1. Be sure to acknowledge your successes (no matter how small).
2. Cheer yourself on for the smallest win.
3. Share your successes with a friend, someone who understands your struggle.
4. Keep a journal of what went well, and why – it is important to keep a positive focus, and NOTICE and ACKNOWLEDGE yourself for what you did that worked.
5. Practice relaxing around food as much as you can – it’s just food . . . really. Try to be calm, purposeful and present in your body. Don’t forget to breathe and be grateful for what you have.
Carol Solomon, Ph.D. is a psychologist and personal coach who specializes in helping people who want to lose weight and eliminate food and weight issues.
By going from food obsessive to charge neutral (i.e. Did I eat today?), she became dedicated to making it easy for others to step off the vicious cycle and live free of anxiety about food and weight.
She is the author of “Lose Weight Now Stay Slim Forever,” a practical “how-to” manual for learning to lose weight without dieting.
Sign up for her free email newsletter, Slim Forever at: http://www.lose-weight-now-stay-slim-forever.com
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