You’ve heard of “The South Beach Diet” and “The Mayo Clinic Diet” but have you ever heard of “The Influenza Diet?” If not, you are missing out on a “real treat” and a terrific opportunity to help you lose and keep off those excess holiday pounds. By the way, it isn’t a diet that you can readily plan on starting, but it is one that forces itself upon you quietly and suddenly.
‘Tis the season to put on weight! Yes, there is something about the month of December that convinces people that what they eat during that month will soon be forgotten by January. You’ve heard the joke: December calories do not get counted! Okay then, when your scale shows your weight has shot up by 13 lbs., who [or what] are you going to say counted the excessive baggage now resting around your gut? Hmmm?
Here a diet, there a diet So, which diet are you going to try? One that omits carbs? Another that restricts sweets? A third one that requires you to sip, not eat your daily nutritional intake? Sounds like fun for someone…maybe the author of the book [or her publisher], the diet club, or the gym pushing the diet.
Did you get your flu shot yet? If you got a flu shot this year, likely you won’t get the flu. Unfortunately, that doesn’t protect you from the dozens of flu-like illnesses roaming our planet at any given time. Now for a real treat: if you contract an illness that attacks your intestine, plan on being laid up for several days. Also plan on losing a bunch of pounds as even the thought of food will make you sick! Yes, like it or not you are on “The Influenza Diet” or one of its many cousins. Ride the diet for what it is worth…drink plenty of water, munch on a few saltine crackers, because other than that you won’t be able to “stomach” anything else at least for several days.
When your appetite returns, gradually resume eating and return to your pre-holiday good eating habits. If the urge to splurge comes upon you, think back to those days when your very bones ached, your stomach churned, and the “porcelain throne” was your frequent companion. If that doesn’t set off a quiver in your liver, than nothing else will. Enjoy the lost pounds and your successful completion of The Influenza Diet.
Copyright 2006 — Matthew Keegan is The Article Writer who writes on a variety of topics including: advocacy, automobiles, aviation, business, Christian themes, family, news, product reviews, travel, writing, and more. Please visit Matt’s blog for absolutely stunning and humorous writings from the master himself!
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