If you want to know how to lose weight and keep it off, then you need the right tools. A sensible eating regime and regular exercise will get you part of the way there. But if you really want to manage your weight long term, you also need to be aware of the pitfalls. Why do some people struggle so badly with their weight? In my experience as a therapist, there are 4 significant elements that hinder weight loss:
One: Your Beliefs
Whatever you believe to be true about yourself creates your reality. You may have heard about this concept many times in books and other resources that talk about the law of attraction. Your subconscious mind acts as a filtering system which brings into your direct awareness everything that supports your beliefs to the exclusion of everything else. How can your beliefs cause weight problems? Well, consider this: Do you believe you are lazy? If so, do you believe this because you are lazy, or are you simply lazy because you believe it?
The answer is the latter. In fact the perception that one is lazy or weak-willed is a very common belief, and one that has stopped many of my clients from managing their weight. So how do you change beliefs that cause you to self-sabotage? Firstly, you need to become aware of what yours are. On a piece of paper, write down: 'I can't lose weight because...' and then list all of the reasons. By bringing these beliefs into conscious awareness, you can imagine letting them go by using visualization.
Two: Your Past
Your past relationships, situations and circumstances greatly impact your present circumstances, including your ability to lose weight. Let's say you are carrying a lot of hurt and resentment about circumstances or people from your past. When you think about these people you start to feel angry or resentful.This takes up a whole lot of physical and mental energy.
On the surface, it might feel as though you are simply too tired to exercise or cannot find the motivation to eat properly; but what is really happening is that your subconscious energy is consumed by these negative feelings and thoughts. The result is that any positive energy that could have been used to help you do the things you must do is simply not available. If you want to lose weight permanently, begin by letting go of negative energy. Meditate on forgiveness. As you heal your emotions, you will heal your body.
Three: Your Present Circumstances
What causes you stress? Do you say yes to others when you should be looking after yourself? Maybe you are struggling to maintain your ground in a toxic relationship. All of these elements affect your hormone levels and in turn, your metabolism. The key to sustainable weight loss is finding new ways to be happier. This starts with creating life balance. Do you work too much? Perhaps you believe doing this will set you up for that one magic day in the future when you will finally be happy.
The problem with this theory is that when you devote all of your energy to just one element of your life (such as work, health or relationship), many other areas can suffer. Happiness experts call this 'uni-dimensional living'. Don't fall into the trap of believing that you can neglect one area of your life in favor of another. This will only cause you to feel tired, frustrated and dis-empowered. Balance is the key.
Four: Subconscious Pay-Offs
What are you gaining from holding onto your excess weight? Maybe you are encountering a power struggle with someone who nags you to do something about your weight. On one hand, you do want to eat better and become fit and healthy; on the other hand, another part of you hates the idea of making this other person 'right' by doing all the things they are telling you that you 'should' be doing. This is just one of the many examples of subconscious pay-offs that keep people from achieving permanent weight loss.
Whenever you are not doing the things that you know you consciously want to do, it is usually because the subconscious pay-off for staying at your current weight is greater than the subconscious pay-off for changing. How do you know what yours are? Start by taking a blank sheet of paper. At the head of the page, write down: "If I lost weight...'. Now allow your mind to think of any negative thoughts that may come into your head. Once you know what they are, you can eradicate them. Self-awareness is the key to all things in life, and we as human beings are free to choose what we believe. So choose to believe that you CAN!
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