Emotional Eaters: Old Habits Die Hard, But You Can Get Over Them!

I spend a lot of time coaching people through emotional eating. It’s a bit like taking apart an onion (ever noticed how many food metaphors I use?). Take off one layer, you think you’ve cracked it then there’s another issue to deal with.

And all of us are susceptible to our old habits.

Including me, last Thursday. I’m being honest here because it was an experience I’m not proud of but we can all learn from it – so I hope you’ll benefit from my situation!

Last Thursday evening I found myself eating everything in sight. Loads of food got hoovered up. I would have gone for junk food except we never have much of it in the house. Actually what I did eat was mercifully obliterated by a food–induced brain haze, though I do remember bowls of cereal (hey, I was desperate) taking part in the eating frenzy.

Actually, as overeating goes it wasn’t that bad – I don’t have the stomach capacity for it anymore. But there came a point in the evening where I realised I was eating not because of physical hunger but just because I wanted to eat.

As I thought about this, while munching, I analysed what emotion was driving me to it. I thought it was anger, but then felt this didn’t accurately describe my emotions – it was more of a severe disgruntlement.

At that point it felt a bit silly to keep on eating but I did anyway – the part of my brain that behaves like a spoilt three year old, I call her the Little Imp, was egging me on. We had a conversation that went something like this –

Me: This is ridiculous, you don’t need this food, you’re not hungry.

Little Imp (arms folded, feet about to stomp): I know. And I don’t care, I’m going to have the food anyway.

Me: But you don’t need it.

Little Imp: But I WANT it. I’ve had a hard week.

Me: Well go on then, have it, if you really want it.

Little Imp (tasting a little bit of food): I shall.

Little Imp ate a bit more and then stopped. Even she could see that the food was totally unnecessary. And as her hard week had been acknowledged, she felt soothed and decided to go away.

It was a hard week, a series of things to sort out including the building work on our home. And the final straw was on Thursday morning, when taking my son to school someone ran into the back of my car. We weren’t hurt, just startled. But the car needs a new bumper and that’s how I ended up in a Major Disgruntled mood.

But it also enabled me to examine in detail the process by which I got my Little Imp under control. So for anyone who finds themselves in this situation this is the process that helped me –

1. Become aware. The first step to stop overeating is to realise you’re doing it. Just quietly say “Yes, this isn’t physical hunger.”

2. Acknowledge the feelings that are leading to this. Are you angry, lonely, frustrated, hurt? See if you can access and acknowledge the emotion.

3. Accept your Little Imp’s need to look after your emotions.

4. Take action to do something different.

My action was to leave Thursday night alone and start afresh the next day – going out to lunch I had salad and had a home-made salad in the evening. Both delicious and nutritious.

So the next time you get that Overwhelming Urge to Eat Everything in Sight... remember aware, acknowledge, accept and action.

And happy, nutritious, healthy, joyful eating to you.

(c) 2009 Liz Copeland

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