I was having fun watching my two cats play one morning when I had one of those AHA moments. I had one of those ‘out of the blue’ moments of clarity that enlightened, empowered and inspired me. The pussycats were playing a leap-frog kind of game when the play turned into aggression. Both cats ‘puffed up’ almost simultaneously. Raised hair on the back and a puffed-out tail are animalistic signs of defensiveness or hostility. In a flash, I thought of the many people I work with who are struggling with weight gain. No matter how many diets or exercise regimens they begin, quit, and begin again they can’t seem to shed unwanted pounds. Have they ‘puffed up’ in fear or hostility? Do my overweight clients have a subconscious fear of losing weight, of the vulnerability of getting rid of their armour of fat?
When you are in a state of fear you cling to your current comfort zone. This fear prevents action. It holds you back. You want to lose weight so badly that it consumes much of your waking thoughts, yet you self-sabotage your weight loss progress for fear of the person you will find under the layers of fat. You are scared of who you are at your innermost core! Being able to stay hidden underneath the extra poundage is a payoff for staying fat. You don’t do anything, such as keeping on unwanted weight, unless you get something out of it. Wearing a fat suit has become part of your identity, and taking off that mask would reveal what you are truly like underneath. What if you don’t like what you see? Obese people fear being exposed if the fat were gone and they had nothing left to hide behind. They fear of losing weight and this fear is grounded in their low self esteem.
Fear of weight loss is not uncommon, especially for those who’ve been overweight since childhood. When self-esteem and health goals collide, the body image goals often triumph. If you have low self-esteem, if you don’t like, or you reject, who you are you will not be able to make positive changes. The ability to move beyond fear, vulnerability and low self-esteem does not come from a place of disgust or self-rejection. Any diet or exercise regime that you engage in that is inspired by self-disgust will be negative and punitive. It will not deliver the outcome, the weight loss, you hope to achieve. Your body will fight back at every turn with the egoic behavior of self-protection and survival. You will stay heavy or ‘puff up’ even more because you’re beating yourself up more and more. The more you beat up on yourself the harder it is to reach for a healthy self-image and let go of your fear. And the vicious cycle becomes a tired repetitive pattern of weight gain, weight loss, more weight gain.
You are not your body. You are your intuition, personal passions, truth and the voice of your inspiration. Get in touch with that part of you. Discover who you are hiding underneath your body weight protection. Learn how to love yourself, unconditionally, and you will effortlessly shed the shields that hide you. You were brought to this earth to live out loud! Come out of hiding and share your magnificent self with the rest of the world. Everyone has a potential for greatness within. Shine the light on yours, let us see who you are. You are a gift just waiting to be unwrapped.
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