Imagine:
Each of these scenarios features well-meaning relatives pushing food on your child. While the grandparents and aunt have the best intentions, they could be innocently contributing to several potential problems affecting your children, such as:
Address the family member. If the food-pushing relative is someone your children see sporadically, ignoring the issue is unlikely to do any long-term harm and may be the best response, says Karen Ansel, MS, RDN, spokesperson for the Academy of Nutrition and Dietetics.
On the other hand, if this relative frequently pushes food on your children, it's important to address it — but make sure to approach the subject delicately. "Rather than doing so in front of your child, speak to the family member in private and explain why it's a problem," Ansel says. "Once you explain your perspective, they will likely have the best interests of your child in mind."
Help relatives find other ways to realize their best intentions. Suggest reading or playing a game together, going out for a movie or special outing, or hiding a sweet note in the child's backpack, lunchbox or under their pillow.
If your children are young, it's best to keep them uninvolved and avoid discussing the problem around them, suggests Jessica Fishman Levinson, MS, RDN, CDN, co-author of We Can Cook: Introduce Your Child to the Joy of Cooking with 75 Simple Recipes and Activities. "If children are aware of the conflict, they may feel self-conscious about what they are eating," she says.
In addition, involving youngsters relays the message that food is an emotionally charged issue, Ansel says.
If your children are old enough to speak for themselves, help them find the right words to express how they are feeling. Before spending time with relatives again, discuss the possible scenarios in which your kids may want to turn down food. Instead of simply saying "no thanks" and fearing you've hurt someone's feelings, have your children prepare saying "no" with a compliment. For example, they can say, "It looks delicious, but it's too close to dinner. May I take some for later?"
Regardless of their age, children shouldn't be made to feel they must eat food they don't want. Consistently teaching them to listen to their own feelings of hunger and fullness will empower them to eat appropriately.
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